I hope today finds you all wrapped in the love of our Lord and your blessed families. We are hitting the point where we are missing home terribly. Christmas in China is very different than home.
Yesterday was Christmas Eve here and we had a really rough day. I think it was a test day. One of the honeymoon's over days. Poor Sydney wrapped up in the middle of it all. Asher decided that he was going to just have a throw a fit at every little thing possible. We spent a little time with another very experienced adoptive family and they shared the foster care program details with us to help us understand and cope with how Asher is acting right now. We didn't realize that even though Asher was in foster care that he would still truly be raised in an environment where he would have the opinion that the world revolves around him all the time. The first two days every thing was hunky dorey....then reality set in that he was not going to be able to have and do everything that he wanted with us....that our family operates as a unit not catering to one person over the other. He was also throwing a temper tantrum at every little upset as well. Very trying on us. Sydney was in the mode of just try to ignore all that is going on around her. Keith was in the discipline and scold mode. And I was in the try to keep peace mode. None of these seemed to co-exist in our little world for the day. By 4:00 we locked ourselves in the room and did not venture out for the remaining of the day. Keith did go downstairs to get us Subway (which tasted nothing like Subway) for dinner and I fixed Asher a cup of noodles. By 8:00 we were in melt down mode all together (I need a good cry at least once a month, so Christmas Eve was my day)......and by 9:00 we were all asleep. I prayed really hard that the next day would be better and that God would set us all right with each other.
We had breakfast with some of our group which all went out to dinner on Christmas Eve and they told us that the street were flooded with people, the restaurants were all packed, and that the church was overflowing with people that even filled the courtyard with at least 100 people, all Chinese. Isn't that incredible. It is so wonderful to know that Christianity is growing at such a high speed in China at this time. To know that several hundred were here in this area to attend church to celebrate the birth of our Lord. Don't ever think that the Chinese don't celebrate Christmas because it is definitely very alive here, very much different than what you would think....but basically just for Christmas Eve evening. Every one works and all the stores are open and the kids all go to school on Christmas day. They don't really give gifts that day either, they save it for the Chinese New Year.
We are all really beside ourselves home sick and even worse to realize that we have 8 days remaining. Feels like eternity. Really missing our loved ones, family, friends, driving, french fries, Real Diet Coke, my puppy, all our other animals, phone conversations, forks and spoons, American toilets, napkins, our own beds, American TV, the Christmas tree, Church, Candle light service, Christmas morning at home with Sydney, and strangely enough snow....and if you know me, then you must know that I AM home sick to miss snow. I know that this may sound petty but unless you have been put is such a foreign place with things you are used to for this long of a period and especially at Christmas then you probably wouldn't understand. I am so so thankful though that we have each other....there are other people here that were not able to bring there kids and I cannot imagine that pain. So I do know that we are blessed that we are all together, safe, and well and I pray that God can help us forget the worldly things that are at home and that on Christmas Day we remember the love that he has given us and we rejoice in that day.
We awoke Christmas morning and had a couple very small gifts for the kids. Asher of course had no idea what a present was or wrapping paper. I showed him how to unwrap the first one and then he did the second like a champ. One was a little rubber band gun that shoots little airplanes across the room, he loved that and he and his daddy played with it for a good while this morning. Sydney received a game for her game boy which is dead at the time and we can not figure out how to get it to recharge....so that was not so exciting and she also received a card game. She is being such a good girl and you can't even tell that she is missing Christmas morning at home but I know from her prior blog that it is a sacrifice for her.....the sad spirit really brings alligator tears to my eyes. My parents always gave their all in making our Christmas' so special when we were kids and I can remember every one from as far back as I can remember.....Christmas was such a magical day at our house. I think Sydney feels the same as I did when I was a kid. My very wonderful, self sacrificing, maybe a little crazy friend and confidant Tamara offered to house sit while we were away, so she will be there to wake up Christmas morning to see what Santa has brought for Christmas.....I can't wait to put Sydney on the phone with her as soon as it is Christmas morning there so that Sydney can hear that Santa did not forget her and hear what he has left for her to open when she gets home so that her face can light up again. She is so in love with her little brother, so I know that she still would have chosen to be here instead of home but it has not come without sacrifice in more than one area, that is for sure.
We met up with our guide and group at 9:30 to do a little shopping. She took us to a porcelain and jade store, then to the pearl market, then to the Noodle house for lunch.
We bought a small tea set and a Christmas ornament at the porcelain and jade store. We bought Sydney a pair of pink pearl earrings for Christmas which she could not wait to wear and was so pleased with. We also bought her and Asher (to give his wife on their wedding day someday) beautiful freshwater pearl necklaces. Asher of course, didn't want anything to do with the jewelry (I am telling you as all boy as they come) and Sydney was in her glory (as all girl as they come). I was expecting the infamous pearl market to be an outdoor tent style market scenario....boy was I wrong. The pearl market is a five story mall with a couple hundred stores in it in which every one of the stores sells pearl jewelry or some other kind of jewelry...so picture it girls....five story of all jewelry, in sane. Really neat but very overwhelming. Oh yes, I almost forgot we did hit one other store in a different mall type place....the DVD store. They care all kinds of basically bootlegged DVD that are in original packaging of all kinds of movies....and get this, they cost about $2.40 each. The movies have the option of how you want to watch them, in Mandarin, Cantonese, English, Japanese...then you also can pick a second language to show as subtitles. So, basically we can play the Chinese words for Asher to watch and then we can read the subtitles if we are watching them with him. They even had movies that are still in the theaters at this time. Keith was soaking this place up a bit. It was fun.
Today Sydney really had to go to the bathroom but held it for two hours until we returned to the room because she along with me refuse to use these squat pot toilets here....too funny. Asher of course has no modesty....he will whip his pants down just about anywhere for all the world to see. Here you see little ones with their parents, or whomever, along side a tree just about anywhere in the open letting it rip so that is a little strange. He is not that over the top though don't get the wrong impression. He is very picky about his cleanliness. If he even gets the slightest bit of water of his shirt or pants, he thinks he needs new clothes....very particular like that. Which I am happy with because I know he has always been kept clean.
Today has been a much better day for us as a family, thank you God. Answered prayer. Yesterday was just a little over the top for my sanity. We are not used to the temper tantrum thing....and you can tell it is not because he is unhappy it is because we are not bowing to his every little tiny need and desire. I cannot get over here how boys are treated like they are kings....our friends tell us that in the adoption world that there is a saying when some one comes over to adopt a little boy is that they are coming to receive a new little emperor because that is how they are used to being treated. But Asher is learning quickly. He knows that we all love him and he is getting that we will get him what he needs in time just not in a split second....his patience is growing. He is also learning that his tantrums just cause us to withdraw and go about without much recognition now, as long as we know he isn't going to hurt himself. I remember when Sydney was about 3 she would have episodes like that and she got over them reasonably quick so I am praying he does too. Asher has opened back up to Daddy today too...yesterday they both kind of shut off to each other and that was really hard to watch. Today he is very happy with daddy and daddy is very happy with him...they have played and loved on each other all day, which has soothed my heart. Asher is napping right now and Keith and Syd are at the park again....I am so glad it is close because Sydney loves going there.
I hope that you all know how much you all mean to us and how much we love you all. It is killing us to be so far away from you all. I guess it is these moments that help you realize how God has blessed you with such a loving family, and we are truly blessed. You are all on our minds all the time! We love you so much and pray that you are able to make it a beautiful day with those that surround you no matter where you are and whom you are with.
No matter how it sounds yesterday went, please know that the love is growing immensely in our new quartet. I am pretty sure that any new family will go through these hiccups and it will make them the stronger for it. I spoke to another couple this morning in our group that have a 6 year old girl and they said that they hit rock bottom last night about 9...so we were just a few hours early. I heard a child screaming bloody murder down the hall like they were right outside our door for a couple hours and come to find out it was her.....those moments are SO hard. Please continue to pray for us and all these special little children that are suffering through these life altering moments of discomfort and unknown.
We have a Christmas Night Dinner tonight with our group. We are all bringing our Bibles and going to have scripture reading, prayer, and meditation with each other tonight to reflect on the gift of our Lord. We are looking forward to this time together. You all will just be waking up as we study......Have a wonderful day and Merry Christmas. Ah, what perfect timing....my little emporer is waking.
Yesterday was Christmas Eve here and we had a really rough day. I think it was a test day. One of the honeymoon's over days. Poor Sydney wrapped up in the middle of it all. Asher decided that he was going to just have a throw a fit at every little thing possible. We spent a little time with another very experienced adoptive family and they shared the foster care program details with us to help us understand and cope with how Asher is acting right now. We didn't realize that even though Asher was in foster care that he would still truly be raised in an environment where he would have the opinion that the world revolves around him all the time. The first two days every thing was hunky dorey....then reality set in that he was not going to be able to have and do everything that he wanted with us....that our family operates as a unit not catering to one person over the other. He was also throwing a temper tantrum at every little upset as well. Very trying on us. Sydney was in the mode of just try to ignore all that is going on around her. Keith was in the discipline and scold mode. And I was in the try to keep peace mode. None of these seemed to co-exist in our little world for the day. By 4:00 we locked ourselves in the room and did not venture out for the remaining of the day. Keith did go downstairs to get us Subway (which tasted nothing like Subway) for dinner and I fixed Asher a cup of noodles. By 8:00 we were in melt down mode all together (I need a good cry at least once a month, so Christmas Eve was my day)......and by 9:00 we were all asleep. I prayed really hard that the next day would be better and that God would set us all right with each other.
We had breakfast with some of our group which all went out to dinner on Christmas Eve and they told us that the street were flooded with people, the restaurants were all packed, and that the church was overflowing with people that even filled the courtyard with at least 100 people, all Chinese. Isn't that incredible. It is so wonderful to know that Christianity is growing at such a high speed in China at this time. To know that several hundred were here in this area to attend church to celebrate the birth of our Lord. Don't ever think that the Chinese don't celebrate Christmas because it is definitely very alive here, very much different than what you would think....but basically just for Christmas Eve evening. Every one works and all the stores are open and the kids all go to school on Christmas day. They don't really give gifts that day either, they save it for the Chinese New Year.
We are all really beside ourselves home sick and even worse to realize that we have 8 days remaining. Feels like eternity. Really missing our loved ones, family, friends, driving, french fries, Real Diet Coke, my puppy, all our other animals, phone conversations, forks and spoons, American toilets, napkins, our own beds, American TV, the Christmas tree, Church, Candle light service, Christmas morning at home with Sydney, and strangely enough snow....and if you know me, then you must know that I AM home sick to miss snow. I know that this may sound petty but unless you have been put is such a foreign place with things you are used to for this long of a period and especially at Christmas then you probably wouldn't understand. I am so so thankful though that we have each other....there are other people here that were not able to bring there kids and I cannot imagine that pain. So I do know that we are blessed that we are all together, safe, and well and I pray that God can help us forget the worldly things that are at home and that on Christmas Day we remember the love that he has given us and we rejoice in that day.
We awoke Christmas morning and had a couple very small gifts for the kids. Asher of course had no idea what a present was or wrapping paper. I showed him how to unwrap the first one and then he did the second like a champ. One was a little rubber band gun that shoots little airplanes across the room, he loved that and he and his daddy played with it for a good while this morning. Sydney received a game for her game boy which is dead at the time and we can not figure out how to get it to recharge....so that was not so exciting and she also received a card game. She is being such a good girl and you can't even tell that she is missing Christmas morning at home but I know from her prior blog that it is a sacrifice for her.....the sad spirit really brings alligator tears to my eyes. My parents always gave their all in making our Christmas' so special when we were kids and I can remember every one from as far back as I can remember.....Christmas was such a magical day at our house. I think Sydney feels the same as I did when I was a kid. My very wonderful, self sacrificing, maybe a little crazy friend and confidant Tamara offered to house sit while we were away, so she will be there to wake up Christmas morning to see what Santa has brought for Christmas.....I can't wait to put Sydney on the phone with her as soon as it is Christmas morning there so that Sydney can hear that Santa did not forget her and hear what he has left for her to open when she gets home so that her face can light up again. She is so in love with her little brother, so I know that she still would have chosen to be here instead of home but it has not come without sacrifice in more than one area, that is for sure.
We met up with our guide and group at 9:30 to do a little shopping. She took us to a porcelain and jade store, then to the pearl market, then to the Noodle house for lunch.
We bought a small tea set and a Christmas ornament at the porcelain and jade store. We bought Sydney a pair of pink pearl earrings for Christmas which she could not wait to wear and was so pleased with. We also bought her and Asher (to give his wife on their wedding day someday) beautiful freshwater pearl necklaces. Asher of course, didn't want anything to do with the jewelry (I am telling you as all boy as they come) and Sydney was in her glory (as all girl as they come). I was expecting the infamous pearl market to be an outdoor tent style market scenario....boy was I wrong. The pearl market is a five story mall with a couple hundred stores in it in which every one of the stores sells pearl jewelry or some other kind of jewelry...so picture it girls....five story of all jewelry, in sane. Really neat but very overwhelming. Oh yes, I almost forgot we did hit one other store in a different mall type place....the DVD store. They care all kinds of basically bootlegged DVD that are in original packaging of all kinds of movies....and get this, they cost about $2.40 each. The movies have the option of how you want to watch them, in Mandarin, Cantonese, English, Japanese...then you also can pick a second language to show as subtitles. So, basically we can play the Chinese words for Asher to watch and then we can read the subtitles if we are watching them with him. They even had movies that are still in the theaters at this time. Keith was soaking this place up a bit. It was fun.
Today Sydney really had to go to the bathroom but held it for two hours until we returned to the room because she along with me refuse to use these squat pot toilets here....too funny. Asher of course has no modesty....he will whip his pants down just about anywhere for all the world to see. Here you see little ones with their parents, or whomever, along side a tree just about anywhere in the open letting it rip so that is a little strange. He is not that over the top though don't get the wrong impression. He is very picky about his cleanliness. If he even gets the slightest bit of water of his shirt or pants, he thinks he needs new clothes....very particular like that. Which I am happy with because I know he has always been kept clean.
Today has been a much better day for us as a family, thank you God. Answered prayer. Yesterday was just a little over the top for my sanity. We are not used to the temper tantrum thing....and you can tell it is not because he is unhappy it is because we are not bowing to his every little tiny need and desire. I cannot get over here how boys are treated like they are kings....our friends tell us that in the adoption world that there is a saying when some one comes over to adopt a little boy is that they are coming to receive a new little emperor because that is how they are used to being treated. But Asher is learning quickly. He knows that we all love him and he is getting that we will get him what he needs in time just not in a split second....his patience is growing. He is also learning that his tantrums just cause us to withdraw and go about without much recognition now, as long as we know he isn't going to hurt himself. I remember when Sydney was about 3 she would have episodes like that and she got over them reasonably quick so I am praying he does too. Asher has opened back up to Daddy today too...yesterday they both kind of shut off to each other and that was really hard to watch. Today he is very happy with daddy and daddy is very happy with him...they have played and loved on each other all day, which has soothed my heart. Asher is napping right now and Keith and Syd are at the park again....I am so glad it is close because Sydney loves going there.
I hope that you all know how much you all mean to us and how much we love you all. It is killing us to be so far away from you all. I guess it is these moments that help you realize how God has blessed you with such a loving family, and we are truly blessed. You are all on our minds all the time! We love you so much and pray that you are able to make it a beautiful day with those that surround you no matter where you are and whom you are with.
No matter how it sounds yesterday went, please know that the love is growing immensely in our new quartet. I am pretty sure that any new family will go through these hiccups and it will make them the stronger for it. I spoke to another couple this morning in our group that have a 6 year old girl and they said that they hit rock bottom last night about 9...so we were just a few hours early. I heard a child screaming bloody murder down the hall like they were right outside our door for a couple hours and come to find out it was her.....those moments are SO hard. Please continue to pray for us and all these special little children that are suffering through these life altering moments of discomfort and unknown.
We have a Christmas Night Dinner tonight with our group. We are all bringing our Bibles and going to have scripture reading, prayer, and meditation with each other tonight to reflect on the gift of our Lord. We are looking forward to this time together. You all will just be waking up as we study......Have a wonderful day and Merry Christmas. Ah, what perfect timing....my little emporer is waking.
3 comments:
Hi Shelly, Keith, Sidney and Asher,
We visited her orphanage today. It went well until we met the lady who took her to Beijing, for her surgery. Chloe had a melt down and started crying. we decided it was time to go.
All day she has been ignoring and being defiant. I attributed it to no nap. We have been correcting it seems alot. Honey moon test.
Oh well wish we were there to celebrate with you. We are going to watch the kids on the computer shortly.
See you soon. Our flight leaves tomorrow. We will be there 8:40p.m.
God Bless you!
Angie, Mark and Chloe Clinton
Well at least things should improve from here.We love you and will continue to pray!
We love and miss you all terribly too. I know that things will get better as each day comes and goes. The love you all have will shine through and things will become normal soon enough. Enjoy what time you have left in China and know that God is with you!! Love Ya All!!!
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