Gestation of an Elephant

Our infamous paper chase began in March, 2006.
( at this time the wait period was 8-11 months for referral)

Seems like SO long ago that I can't remember half of what all those papers say now.

After all the running and mailing and notarizing, etc., etc.....we finally succeeded and had a log in date, TA DUHHHHH, we did it! 11/20/2006 - LID
(at this time the wait for a referral 12-14 months)

Then we waited.

And we waited.

And told everyone under the sun.

And we waited some more.

Had no answers for all the "When?" questions. All we could tell them was it will be a girl, for sure, and she will be around 9 - 18 months old.


In the mean time we had bought a few nursery items.....the bedding, some stuffed animals, clothes, little shoes, bibs, bottles....you know all the common sense stuff. At least to us at the time.
(at this time the wait for your referral had grown to 16-19 months)

Time to renew our paper work and go get more fingerprints again and WAIT some more.

We still decided not to actually paint the room or unpack or wash any of the items. It seemed if we did those things that going into that fully prepared nursery without a baby would be even more painful. It was a bit easier to just forget that this was all going on in the background of our lives without those reminders of it laying around, so we closed the door on the room and kept very busy with life.
(at this time the wait for the referral had grown to 21-24 months)

Still keeping busy.
(at this time the wait for a referral had grown to 27-30 months)

We are getting older and our daughter may no longer be a sibling/playmate versus a good babysitter.
(at this time the wait for a referral had grown to 30-32 months)

So, we had an epiphany! We could always seek out a child through our state foster care programs that is a little older and still continue on our China journey and not mess anything up with the time frame because we could be placed domestically and then still have the year or so time frame or uninterrupted family status to receive our China referral. That would work perfectly! So, we started calling and talking to individuals throughout the system about a child between the ages of 3 -6 years old that was available for adoption. Within a couple of weeks we found a child that we fell in love with, sent in our home study (along with about 120+ more people), received a call that we had been selected in the top 10 families for the child, and then received a call that we were eliminated because we had been open with the fact that we were adopting from China and "should" receive a referral within the next 12 - 24 months. They told us that they just felt the child should remain the youngest child in a family for longer than that and possibly forever. We were just not prepared to fore go our plans for our Chinese adoption....we were determined that the process was not going to beat us and we were not going to give up.

Going through this acceptance of loss was so heartbreaking for us all. We had all three fallen in love with the thought of this child and realized that the wait was causing us more pain than we let show. Our desire for a child had grown so immensely that it took going through this to feel again....to realize how much we all longed for another child in our family.

Our perseverance is unwavering.

Funny how going through a process like that can open your eyes.

All these months of waiting, we had been signed up to be able to view the special needs children but knew that we could truly never consider a special needs child because my hubby and I are both self employed and in turn have terrible health insurance, therefore, could not provide adequate health care to a deserving child and would also not qualify for any assistance because we fall just over the income brackets but WAY below where we could afford to pay the medical expenses yourself. But, it was so nice to see the children's faces and imagine what our child would look like....and secretly hope that there would be one that would be minor enough that we could afford to pay for their needs outside of the insurance.

Swallowing that reality, we were determined to wait for a referral from the non special needs program.

Then we received the answer.......God's plan unveiled. You know the famous saying, "Just when you think that you know what God plan is, He changes it." Yep! Big change!

By what we thought was common sense and assumption, 99% of the children that are adopted from China are girls. So, we blindly assumed we were going to get a little girl and she would be an infant because we were in the non special needs program.

Then on 9/26/08 we received an email from our agency that they have been assigned a small group of special needs little BOYS 4-5 years old that are only marked special needs because of their age. Blessing for us!

It took us a few days of deep thought as in how this plan changed what we perceived to be God's plan for us that we were so bound to with unwavering faith until we finally got the fact that God had been preparing our heart for a little older child ever since our state adoption ordeal. That He had never said or shown us that He would be giving us a girl and had never said or shown us that the child would be a baby. We had just assumed by what we had been told and the referrals that we had seen given. It is amazing how the good Lord knows what we need so long before we can even think it. We just knew that we were willing and open to a child that was healthy and that we wanted our daughter to remain the eldest child in our family. As for her, she wanted any child, a sibling....she has an amazing heart and in her words she didn't care if they only had one eye and it is in the middle of their forehead. God speaks volumes to me through that little girl, she is a true answered prayer and inspiration to me.

As our story develops, we decide to go for it and call our agency and request a little BOY!!!! Still gives me tingles down my spine to imagine this joyful child and butterflies in my stomach to know that he is real. This turned into a hard decision, for my hubby and I both were both drawn to two little boys. We never imagined there would be a choice and how could there be the right one...we wanted both boys and tried to see if they would let us take both but China does not allow more than one child unless they are twins. So, again a delima. "Please God, how do we know which is the right one?"

Back to signs......my friend in church, the one with the little China Doll, is always giving me little mementos that they picked up on their China trip years ago. It is such a blessing, I think she knows that it keeps me focused on the prize at the end of this journey and keeps my spirits up. She is always thinking of others, a truly beautiful woman of God. We had an after church event this one Sunday and I finally had a moment to sit and talk with her about our delima. She was very supportive and all she could say is that you will know which one is right and He will reveal it at the perfect moment. Well about 10 minutes later....not knowing anything in details about the two little boys names...she brings me a gift bag in and says that she has had it in her car for days and has been waiting to see me to give it to me. Just a little something and it will still work even though it is going to be a little boy.

What a woman! I hope everyone is blessed in life with people like this....I have a couple very very special ones (thank you, Lord). I don't know how I would make it through some days without them.

Anyway, I open the bag and burst into immediate tears. The bag contained a bright red picture frame that has the Chinese calligraphy on the interior and around the frame has the English words and they read, "Little Treasure".

One of the little boys Chinese names that was given was Bao Shi Xiong which translates to "Treasure", History, and Blessed/Lucky
Did you catch that.....TREASURE!!
So that decided it for us and we took that as another sign from God...how else could that have happened without Him being involved.

So we turned in our Letter of Intent and was told that we should hear something in about 2 - 10 weeks for what would be called our pre-approval.

Two weeks and two days later we received a call telling us they had received our PA (pre-approval), yeah!!! shorter time frame. That is awesome, finally time was on our side.

Next, we would need to wait on the Letter of Acceptance, which should take about 3-4 months.

One week later to the day....we received the call to say that our LOA had arrived in record time. GO GOD make it happen!! That was a day to remember, the emotions of that were and still are amazing. Like I truly just delivered this little boy physically. Grand happiness for all of us. Tears, laughter, gasping of breath....just simply overwhelmed.

So now....I go into sheer urgent nesting mode!
I swear if I could be physically lactating at this moment, I would be.
We all start cleaning, painting, buying stuff, getting his room ready, finding clothes. How crazy and fun and exciting. Crazy fun shopping spree with my dearest friend which bought a football toy box and filled it "literally" with toys for him at ToysRUs.

And now we think that we may be ready to receive our next step....the TA (travel approval) which is suppose to take 2 - 4 weeks, but typically 4 weeks. We may be spending our Christmas in China....how incredibly crazy cool.


Thank you Lord for all your blessing and even more so for the pain and anxiety that you turn into good. There is nothing that surpasses your greatness.